Tuesday, September 09, 2008

so I have had MANY friends in the 30 years of my life. It was soooo easy when i was little I decided. But I am starting to think that i have never had a normal friend ship. I think I rely to heavily on my friends to show me how awesome I am. When all the while i should beable to see how awesome I am in other ways too. Why is that so hard.

what is a normal friend ship anyway? I don't really know. I put myself out there regularly showing that I am willing to make friends but then nothing becomes of it. Am I relying to much on them making the next step?

I do have some great friends right now. But I just had to mentally say goodbye to someone who I have considered a good friend for that last year and a half. MY BOSS. I still work with her and see her everyday but I just do not think that a friendship is something that we can keep going. it makes me really sad. I have not told her that I really can not consider her a friend anymore because its just too painful but I am showing it by not doing things outside of work with her. No more do i hope and wish for that. we will just have to remain boss and employee.

2 comments:

spaceyhawks said...

That's definately got to be hard for you. I am glad you have come to know that you are an amazing person and you don't need others to tell you. But I will still tell you all the time how great I think you are, and I will always appreciate and love you, no matter what.

Sabrina said...

you are one of my great friends Traci. Thank you!!!